Parade

Parade

Ding, dong, boom!

February 14 1959
Parade

Parade

Ding, dong, boom!

February 14 1959

Parade

Ding, dong, boom!

We’re happy to report that the noonday gun that sounded daily from Signal Hill in St. John’s, Newfoundland, is booming away again after a ten-year silence. The custom was abandoned when percussion caps to fire the old gun became hard to obtain, but now a modern six-pounder has been procured and everyone seems greatly relieved. Everyone but local clergymen, that is. There isn’t anything much more disconcerting than having a gun blast off just as you get your sermon nicely rolling, and see your entire congregation take time out to set their watches.

* * *

Out from Ottawa civil-service head-

quarters to government offices everywhere in Canada has been mailed a poster from the Suggestion Award Board of the Public Service of Canada. “From crossing two knives came a pair of scissors,” says the poster, and adds the moral. “That was creative thinking.” The artist who created the poster wasn't thinking, though, because in his illustration

the scissors are assembled with the blades backwards so they won’t cut a thing.

* * *

Youth may be going all to heck in some places but not in Beauharnois, Que. In the school there a couple of grade 8 girls were asked to supervise grade 2 pupils while they ate their sandwiches

each noon hour, and one young boy developed quite a crush on one of the thirteen-year-old supervisors. To humor him she presented him with a snapshot of herself which he took proudly home from school. But a couple of days later

the seven-year-old swain handed it back with the sober explanation. "At my age good Christians don't go around chasing girls.”

* * *

Despite the over-all success of the annual church canvass there’s a minister of a Victoria. B.C.. church who has been doing a lot of troubled thinking about a brand-new excuse brought back by one of his teams of church visitors. “We d like to give something, understand,” said the housewife, “but my husband is the only one in the family working at the present time.”

An ordinary sort of citizen, stopping by a bank on Spring Garden Rd. in Halifax to get his passbook updated, was somewhat cowed to see a shiny Rolls-

Royce sweep up to the curb and a regallooking elderly woman sweep into the bank just ahead of him. Fighting an inclination to tug at his forelock he fell in behind her and resigned himself for a wait at the teller's wicket while the old lady attended to her obviously impressive financial affairs. But all she did was cash her old-age-pension cheque, and sweep out again.

* * *

There's a traffic regulation sign in Toronto that one motorist won’t quickly forget. It reads "There is no parking in this driveway”—and it is scratched into the paint on the back of his car.

* * *

This time of year brings us as many hunting stories as weather stories, but with a difference this season, for the game birds are just giving themselves up. In Hairy Hill, Alta., the teacher of a grade 8 science class was apologizing that he didn't have an actual specimen of a partridge to illustrate the day’s lesson, when a partridge obligingly crashed through the classroom window. And Boy Scouts at their campsite three miles north of Revelstoke, B.C.. no sooner got the sticks rubbed and the flames blazing to prepare lunch than a large grouse whirred into their clearing and landed right in the fire. The troop jester barely had time to exclaim, “Out of the fire into the frying pan!" before their scoutmaster, a butcher by trade, had shown them precisely how to do it.

* * *

You’d think medical men would always be willing to do anything to support law and order but Ottawa physicians have finally balked according to a Journal headline:

DOCTORS REFUSE TEST DRINKING DRIVER’S BLOOD

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