hatever the fate of the beleaguered British monarchy, one thing seems certain: the woman whom Prince Charles loves is unlikely to live happily ever after. First, Camilla Parker Bowles topped Mr. Blackwell’s 35th annual list of the worstdressed women in the world. “She looked in the mirror and watched it crack,” the selfproclaimed fashion arbiter cackled last week. Then, Parker Bowles, 47, and her husband, Brig. Andrew Parker Bowles, 55, announced that their 21-year marriage was over. Royal watchers were placing bets on the likelihood that Charles, 46, would finally divorce Diana, the Princess of Wales, from whom he separated in 1992 after 11 years of marriage. An authorized biography published last year, The Prince of Wales, asserted that Charles and Camilla had indulged in three affairs over 25 years. Constitutional experts declared that divorce and remarriage would not affect the prince’s right to succeed Queen Elizabeth. But many Britons—not least among them the 33-year-old Diana—have vowed that Parker Bowles will never become queen. Diana is determined to have her sons, princes William and Harry, keep their distance from the woman she calls “the Rottweiler.” “The one thing that would drive Diana into a fury,” said a friend, “would be Charles and Camilla playing happy families with the boys.” Indeed, some speculate that the Queen might go so far as to pressure Charles to renounce his right to the throne, positioning Prince William, 12, as heir. That scenario would suit Diana to a tee, with Parker Bowles forever cast as the wicked stepmother.
BEST-SELLERS FICTION NONFICTION 1. The Celestine Prophecy, James Redfi eld (2) 2. Politically Correct Bedtime Stories, James Finn Garner (1) 3. Open Secrets, Alice Munro (3) 4. Faith, Len Deighton (4) 5. A Discovery of Strangers, Rudy Wiebe (6) 6. The Cunning Man, Robertson Davies (7) 7. Insomnia, Stephen King (9) 8. The Lottery Winner, Mary Higgins Clark 9. Original Sin, P. DJames (5) 10. A Son of the Circus, John Irving (8) ( ) Position last week 1. On the Take, Stevie Cameron (1) 2. The Warren Buffett Way, Roger Hagstrom 3. Crossing the Threshold of Hope, Pope John Paul II (3) 4. Food, Susan Powter 5. Riel, Maggie Siggins (4) 6. Couplehood, Paul Reiser (6) 7. Jean Béliveau: My Life in Hockey, Jean Biliveau (8) 8. Karen Kain: Movement Never Lies, Karen Kain (7) 9. Pale Blue Dot, Cavi Sagan 10. Long Walk to Freedom, Nelson Mandela (2) Compiled by Brian Bethune
BATTLE OVER THE B-WORD
The new-broom U.S. House of Representatives, under Speaker Newt Gingrich, was not a week old. Neither was a media debate over the words that CBS TV’s Connie Chung wormed out of Newt’s mother about her son’s opinion of First Lady Hillary Clinton (“She’s a bitch”).The affair prompted some deep analysis of B-word usage. “Yes, I would say Hillary’s a bitch, and I mean that with all admiration,” said writer Elizabeth Hilts, author of Getting in Touch with Your Inner Bitch. Then, a new sensation upstaged everything. Last week, The New York Times published First Lady statements— including “I think I was naive and dumb” about politics—from a White House lunch with a dozen women reporters, including the Times' Marian Burros.
Other lunchers insisted that Hillary’s words were off the record. And hell hath no fury like a reporter scooped. New York Post gossip columnist
Cindy Adams de-
nounced Burros in print: “Days ago, Connie Chung and Mommy Gingrich zapped Hillary Rodham Clinton. Yesterday, The New York Times sandbagged her.” Adams also assailed the Times as “the Grey Lady who is clearly suffering menopause.” But Adams refrained from applying the B-word to her rival. In some cases, reported Richard Leiby in The Washington Post, “it’s a compliment.” And a full moon was still days away.
POP MOVIES Top movies in Canada, ranked according to box-office receipts during the seven days that ended on Jan. 12. (In brackets: number of screens/weeks showing.) 1. Dumb and Dumber (146/4) $1,227,880 2~ Nell (84/3) $800,625 3. Disclosure (113/5) $738,950 4. The Jungle Book (106/3) $535,090 5. Little Women (85/4) $496,995 6. Houseguest (75/1) $373,920 7. Street Fighter (91/3) $327,300 8. The Santa Clause (108/9) $247,920 9. Richie Rich (117/4) $245,010 10. Ready to Wear (36/3) $226,455 COPYRIGHT ENTERTAINMENT DATA INC.
OFFICER AND A GENTLEMAN
Since he became Governor General in 1990, Ramon Hnatyshyn has invested 699 Canadians with the Order of Canada. Last week, he performed the ceremony for the last time before he leaves office next month. And although the event was infused with pomp and circumstance, it was also tailor-made for the Order’s newest officer. Traditionally, recipients are honored at Rideau Hall in Ottawa or at the governor general’s other official residence, La Citadel in Quebec City. But Hnatyshyn made an exception for former Ontario attorney general Ian Scott— who joined the Order during a special ceremony in Toronto. Last May, Scott—a member of David Peterson’s Liberal government from 1985 to 1990—suffered a stroke that affected his speech and caused partial paralysis. A colleague, lawyer Ian Roland, said Scott’s fighting spirit made the occasion especially moving. Added Roland: ‘This event was an important indication that he is still a part of society.”
WHO OWNS JOHN CABOT?
An event that happened nearly 500 years ago is at the heart of a modern-day controversy in Atlantic Canada. In 1497, the Anglo-Italian navigator John Cabot arrived in North America—although no one can agree on the actual site. Both Newfoundland and Nova Scotia claim the honor and are preparing major celebrations throughout 1997 to commemorate his landing. The Newfoundland government has set up the Cabot 500 Corporation to co-ordinate the yearlong festivities. It also plans to build a museum dedicated to Cabot’s legacy at a site yet to be determined. At the same time, there are plans for a John Cabot Discovery Centre on Cape Breton Island.
Outsiders are steering clear of the Cabot controversy. The federal Historic Sites and Monuments Board has plaques commemorating the voyage at both Bonavista, Nfld., and Cape North, N.S. Both plaques say that claims about the precise location of Cabot’s landing are based on “local tradition.” Meanwhile, a replica of Cabot’s ship, the Matthew, is under construction in Bristol, England, the city from which he originally sailed in 1497. It will cross the Atlantic and land at Bonavista on June 24,1997, before going on to Cape North. The question of Cabot’s exact landing site may never be answered—but that should not stop a few lively celeCabot: celebrations bradons of the event.
When people talk face-to-face or on the telephone, their voices help convey their meaning. But in the sterile, soundless world of electronic mail, it can sometimes be difficult to determine the emotional tone of a statement. To overcome this problem, hordes of electronic creatures known as “smileys” are evolving in cyberspace. The original e-mail smiley—composed of a colon, a dash and a close-bracket symbol—and the hundreds of symbols devised since then, are “drawn” by the sender using the keys available on the typical keyboard. Recipients get the picture by tilting their heads to the left, in this case to view the original smiley: :-)
Now, smileys are also being used to indicate accents or geographic origins. A sampling:
Edited by BARBARA WICKENS
>:-> a cynical grin
;A) a smirk
;-) a wink
:-o a yawn
:-J tongue in cheek
:-D laughing out loud, or joking
7:A] Ronald Reagan or
5:-) Elvis for U.S. accents
.-) Moshe Dayan (Israeli)
+-(:-) the Pope (Italian)
:-[ a vampire (T ransylvania)
d:-) a baseball player (North America)
d8= a beaver (Canadian)
CHARGED: Qubilah Shabazz, 34, a daughter of slain Black Muslim leader Malcolm X, with plotting to kill her father’s rival, Louis Farrakhan; in Minneapolis. Malcolm was gunned down at age 39 in her presence in 1965, while making a speech in New York City—and his family has long accused Farrakhan, now head of the Nation of Islam, of < masterminding the as-§ sassination. Authori-ties say Shabazz hired § a hitman to kill Far2 rakhan, who staunchly u defended then-Nation of Islam leader Elijah Muhammad against Malcolm’s criticisms of Muhammad’s lavish lifestyle and religious teachings. Shabazz denies the charges.
DIED: British comedian Peter Cook, 57, hailed as one of the godfathers of contemporary satire; of a gastrointestinal hemorrhage, in London. Along with Dudley Moore, Jonathan Miller and Alan Bennett, Cook formed the internationally acclaimed 1960s comedy revue Beyond the Fringe. In 1961, he founded the satirical magazine Private Eye and remained its publisher until his death.
DIED: Writer Kathleen Tynan, 57, who wrote a critically acclaimed biography of her late husband, powerful British drama critic Kenneth Tynan; of cancer, in London. Her edited collection of Tynan’s letters was published last fall. The daughter of legendary Canadian journalist Matthew Halton and the sister of CBC correspondent David Halton, Tynan also wrote the screenplay for Agatha (1979) based on her novel.
DIED: Former world middleweight boxing champion (1970-1977) Carlos Monzon, 52, in an accident while driving back from a weekend leave to the prison where he was serving an 11-year sentence for killing his exwife after she fell off a balcony during a fight; near Santa Fe, Argentina.
DIED: Former Laotian Communist president Prince Souphanouvong, 86; in Laos. Known as the Red Prince, he led Communist guerrilla forces for more than two decades before defeating in 1975 the rightist government led by his half-brother, Prince Souvanna Phouma.
DIED: Lloyd Bowen, 92, known as Canada’s father of fluoride; in Toronto. As executive director of the Health League of Canada, Bowen led the eight-year bitter legal battle to the Supreme Court of Canada and through a barely successful referendum that led to the fluoridation of Metropolitan Toronto’s water supply in 1963.
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