Wit and Wisdom

In Fewer Words

April 15 1942
Wit and Wisdom

In Fewer Words

April 15 1942

In Fewer Words

Wit and Wisdom

An Ice Idea—Up at the barracks they have a new name for the guys called up for military training. They call them “icicles” — drips that got caught in the draft.—Regina LeaderPost.

Bravo, Australia!—If ever a country should be helped it is Australia which gave men, money and materials to the Allied cause without stint, but now finds herself facing actual warfare on her own shores.— St. Thomas Times-Journal.

Unfinished Business—A jury with eight women on it returned a verdict in two minutes. Wonder where the sale was.—Guelph Mercury.

IIow About Snapdragons? — Until they announced rubber could he made from the lowly dandelion, we had no idea we lived on a plantation ! —North Bay Nugget.

And Swallows, Spring—Protect the birds. The dove brings peace and the stork brings tax exemption. — Kitchener Record.

Russ-skis Are Iluss-skis—The

Russian symbol should be hammer and tongs.—Brandon Sun.

NEIGHBORLY SQUAWK

His manner seemed both meek and mild,

Yet fire was in his eye.

I asked him what disturbed him so, And this was his reply:

“My neighbor to the east of me Has bought a radio;

He’s so blamed proud of the machine, He simply lets it go:

By day, by night, week in, week out, One can’t escape its blare;

Full blast he runs it all the time And never turns a hair.

“My neighbor to the west is deaf, I’m certain sure of that.

His radio, with equal power,

Is left all day to blatt.

I’m quite aware the radio’s A blessing in its way,

And only for its proper use I humbly beg to pray.

“A man who owns a motor car Must keep a certain speed,

And for the rights of fellowmen Have proper sort of heed.

A man who goes up flying Must keep himself aloof,

And not come gaily hurtling down And crash the nearest roof.

“When I go out to spray my lawn With length of garden hose,

I do not turn the nozzle at My nearest neighbor’s nose.

If my dog gets to snapping, he Must have a muzzle on.

I do not use my neighbor’s bath To let my goldfish spawn.

“So when I get a radio Why should I let it blare,

Until the neighborhood goes mad And starts to claw its hair?

Why make a large, unwanted din All up and down the town?

The music’s all the better for A little tuning down.”

—L. G. B.